An Island of Estrogen in a Sea of Testosterone

Although I do not live alone, there are days when I feel I do. I am the lone female in our home. I have been married to a wonderful, loving man for almost 15 years. We have 4 sons, ages 13, 11 and 8 year old twins. Even our two dogs and the bird are male. I am outnumbered in a major way. Don't get me wrong, I love men. It's just that living with all of these boys can make a girl a little cuckoo for cocoa puffs.

1. Boys have three speeds. Full Speed. Sleep and that vegetative state that takes over during TV or video games.

2. Boys have absolutely no volume control and no awareness that sound travels.

3. Until the age of 13 they do not understand the necessity of showering. They find it merely an irritating annoyance that interrupts their loud activities.

4. They find farting the creme De la creme of hilarity....the real ones....arm farts take a close second.

5. They have no filter and say things like, "Mommy, when you married Daddy you didn't have as many lines on your face."

6. There is the innate inability to get clothes into a laundry basket. Items land around the basket but never in it.

7. A similar aim issue comes into play when using the bathroom.

But you know what the best thing about boys is? They don't hang onto stuff the way women and girls do. When girls fight about something, they tend to hang onto it and have years of drama. Not boys. With boys, they fight and when it's over...it's over. They are much better and shedding things than we are.

For all their loud, crazy, stinky stuff....I love having boys. Although there are moments when I don't really understand them, I'm having a blast figuring it out. So no tea parties or Barbies for me. I'm putting on my sneakers and heading out for some backyard basketball with my boys.