Good Morning Everyone,
Today I woke early which is not often for me since I am a late night person and can't manage to get out of bed until noon. But today was a special day for me anyway with the closing of my home back East fast arriving finally this Tuesday. Today is the day I sign a home away that I lived in for the past 30 years. A home filled with many memories, both good and bad. Leaving behind great neighbors and fun times. But it was the final realization for me that this was forever. I would no longer be able to go back after this, and last night I was feeling a bit meloncholy.
My daughter said she cries a lot because I am now living on the other side of the country. I told her she could always move out here eventually, and that I was a 5 hour flight away and a 3 day drive. I speak to her daily, but we haven't seen each other in a year, and now with the baby on the way she is getting a bit more emotional. We talked about the house a bit and the loss of her Dad. But I told her to remember the good things, keep the good memories, and that's when it hit me.
I realized at that point that I had forgotten who I was and the things I enjoyed doing. It wasn't that I wanted to forget, it was the circumstances I was placed into at that time that made me want to forget.
I used to love to sit for hours and read a good book, crochet a blanket and do arts and crafts. I stopped all that five years ago and it was as if my entire life had stopped dead right at that time. So I decided to put my writing on hold for a few months and stop to smell the roses and take time out for my family and friends.
I lost so many loved ones in my lifetime including my parents at a fairly young age, and said I didn't want that to happen to my children. The stress had been mounting between the house sale and my writing and I was at a breaking point, and was feeling the physical aspects of it and that's when I made the decision to put the books down and focus on life.
Sometimes we forget what's important to us and what our lives used to be like because we begin to make changes to our lives and our careers. I was so focused on writing that it actually consumed me and all of my time.
So from this day forward I am taking the time to get out of the house and away from the computer on a day to day basis. I will be flying back to Jersey in February for the birth of my first grandchild, then staying for a couple weeks. That's number one.
Today I will pull out my paints and begin painting again, and then pull out the books I swore I'd finish five years ago and never did.
So that being said, I will breathe a sigh of relief and begin my process of learning how to relax again.
To happy stress free lives...