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Thursday, January 28, 2010

Fictional Menages vs REAL Menages

By A.J. Llewellyn

We romance authors know what's hot. Our publishers let us know and so do the top ten lists at every romance publishing house. Some authors defy the trending genres and sell their pants off regardless of what is considered currently "hot".
Some authors jump on the new, glowing tide with mixed results.Menages is hot. Paranormal menages, even better. Some are frankly ludicrous...even frightening.
What kind of a REAL menages involves one women and say three, or even four men where the guys don't touch each other? That's not a menages it's a gang bang and in reality would make for one sore woman.
I am gay and I write gay menages. I have also written two books with men and women (My Hawaiian Song of Love, Quartetto) the latter of which featured three men and a woman.In romance writing parlance it was a M/M/M/F which indicates the men get it on. I've noticed a new genre cropping up: M/F/M which signifies the girl gets lucky with the guys but the guys don't get lucky with each other.
Now, I've talked to many friends who are het and who swing. They tell me in real life, this is possible. However, in real life, the fantasy acted out in reality is often one man and two women. For a guy, for example, who wants to see his wife taken by a hot, hung stranger, he might sit by and watch and join in...but not every single day.I have a friend who wanted to swing and she and her husband went to a sex club.
Her sex partner was apparently a very free and easy guy who grabbed her husband and as she said to me, "he got my husband ready for me. It was a total turn on."
"For you or for him?" I asked her.
"For me...and later on, he admitted he was taken by surprise, but he liked it. Would we do it again? I don't know. He wants another woman with me, but I'm not interested."
As for three or four men taking on a woman and not even getting near each other, I am told, and as I suspected, it is highly improbable.
My friend Leslie who performs in and directs straight porn tells me that when she and her hubby play with others, some guys love the feel of another man's cock, especially when it's just been inside the woman they're playing with.
"My husband is great for playtime with other women, but would never touch another man," she told me last night.
I asked her about a scene in a book I described to her, one that I had just read where three men took turns having sex with the woman. I found it unbelievable that they placidly took turns er...enjoying her and nothing else was going on.
"That sounds like a damned dreary party," she said. "I can't imagine that happening."
Leslie is heavily involved in the swinger scene and has shot a couple of orgies for camera.
"What you are describing is an orgy and is borderline gang rape," she said. "If it goes on for hours and the chick is spent and still the guys are doing real life, she'd be in a lot of pain. Besides, Ive been in a real orgy and there is nothing like them. There is an urgency...a pure picnic of pleasure. It would take at least two women to entertain a few guys. I'm a porn actress and I wouldn't want to take on three or four guys on my own. I mean, come on."
So I am curious.
Why do you think this genre is now hot to the point of being a, ridiculous? Maybe they're written for women by women who have a fetish for being the center of attention, but is it even remotely realistic?
Or am I the one who's eating crazy pie?
I'd really value your thoughts.

Aloha oe,



Lynn Crain said...

Interesting blog and it's much as I suspected. And for me it would totally depend upon the story.

I have one polyamourous relationship where there are two women and two men and they are all into each other.

The one I'm writing now, one of the guys swings both ways but the other one doesn't. There will be something regarding that at some point.

But in each of those stories, the story dictated how it would go. And since I write character driven stories, I would expect them to tell me how they want to act.

Now, I read a story once by a NYC published author where there were a series of brothers who all took the woman as some rite of passage into the family. I always thought that very, very bizarre and very odd. I'e been with groups of brothers and most were territorial where their women were concerned. It just din't appeal at all.

But then, different strokes. Again, thanks for the great blog. Lots of interesting information.


C.R. Moss said...

you're not the only one eating crazy pie. i think the multiple string of lovers (over 3) in one scene or in the concept of sexual relationships is unrealistic, especially if they all aren't bi.
In my own stories, I've written threesomes but usually it's 2 guys and a girl and the guys aren't into each other. I had one scene where there were two girls and a guy but the one lady was a spirit. does that count? lol. but anything more than 3 i think i'd wear myself out just trying to keep all the parts and twigs and berries in place. so for me it's a max of 3 or plain ol' m/f, m/m or f/f.

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