Bling Me

By A.J. Llewellyn

Any author will tell you that we love what we do. Some lucky ones get to completely support themselves on their earnings, the rest of us either have full-time jobs on top of writing or, we take part-time work to supplement our incomes.
To be honest, I enjoy working. Being in the grip of the Protestant work ethic was ingrained in me from the time I had my first paper route at the age of nine in Bondi Beach, Sydney.
I don't mind juggling. I really don't. The busier I am, the more I like it. I get a huge satisfaction out of paying bills out of money earned from writing, but I also get a lot of fodder from my day jobs.
A few months ago, a friend of mine got me in with a celebrity assistant's club. I've picked up work here and there and have had the terrible misfortune of working a few times with an actress whose career is on the slide. I say on the slide because she recently lost her home to foreclosure due to her shopping addiction and...diminished income.
I accompanied her to bankruptcy court and small claims courts - all of these incidents will no doubt show up in my books some time soon - and I was even there when she went to a salon to get her asshole bleached.I swear.
This last one I did already use in The Book and the Rose.
Anyway, the Actress was pissed about moving from her oceanside digs in Malibu to -shudder- The Valley. Now, I happen to live in the valley and bitterly resent the constant jibes people from the other side of the hill make about my home town.
I've worked for Z-list Actress now for a few months and off and it has never been pleasant.
A couple od days ago, I helped take her dogs to the vet.We have a saying in my birth country of Australia. When someone is taken advantage of, we say, they saw her coming.Well this vet saw The Actress coming.
A routine office check-up for three small dogs turned into a $2,000 vet bill. It would have been more if I hadn't argued the point about unnecessary tests and phantom illnesses.Yesterday, her credit card must have been burning a hole in her pocket. We dropped the dogs home and traipsed along Ventura Boulevard where she shopped her heart out.
She dropped another $2,000 on an electric blanket, bought a new lap top at the Apple Store, some bling for her iPhone. Then she remembered she'd lost her iPhone and we bought a replacement.We stopped by my goddaughter's house where I deputized her to bling the new iPhone. I'm all thumbs when it comes to crafty crap.
My goddaughter however, was born to bling.The Actress and I drove off. I kept wondering how somebody who'd just been through bankruptcy and foreclosure was still able to spend this way.
She bought French underwear - a snip at $500 for two panties and a push-up bra - blinged dog collars for the pooches, new shoes - for her, not them. They all got tutus [I swear] - and then she insisted on having lunch.
I didn't want to have lunch. I had fresh bread and peanut butter at home. I was happy to go home and have that.
But oh no. She wanted a lavish lunch. Unfortunately, I know her well and have had terrible experiences with her before.In spite of her lavish public declarations that she would buy me lunch, I knew she would make my life miserable if I picked anything she deemed expensive. I ordered a cup of soup and an iced tea. I knew I could afford these should she gripe. And I just knew she would.
She berated the poor waiter and I begged her not to. I am always nice to people who handle my food. They could spit in it. Or worse.The Actress hauled out her laptop in the middle of this swanky restaurant as she tore through spinach salad, char-broiled salmon, apple pie and several cappuccinos. She shopped for more crap online - a lanyard holder for her new iPhone and new sunglasses.
She argued with her mother on the phone and didn't seem to notice how aggravated our nearest neighbors and the entire restaurant staff were.After being sniped at for four and a half hours, something came over me when she griped about the $7.00 for my soup and tea (tax and tip included).
I told her I couldn't take it anymore. I think I actually said I hate you. She looked shocked. I don't think she hears those words too often, except from her ex husbands.
She owed me $67.50 for the time I'd been her whipping post and dangled this over my head.I said I didn't care.
"You don't care?"
"No, I don't," I said.
I got up and walked out.
"Can't you take her with you?" the waiter begged.
My dear friend Kelly has quoted me from Benjamin Franklin who once said never to keep friends who are not like yourself. Somebody else once said - maybe it was Heidi Fleiss - we are guilty by association.
I didn't want to associate with an asshole boss. I don't care that money is involved. It's too painful dealing with such insanity. I drove home feeling both bad and good. It's hard to walk away from an income.
She apparently collected her cell phone from my goddaughter and was very sweet with her, paying her $20.
Then she drove to my place and somehow got into my building and showed up at my front door. She put on a marvelous performance.
Oscar-worthy.
I accepted her check for $67.50 and then said goodbye.
She hasn't stopped calling since. This morning, I found a pink diamante in my socks. My little ode to bling. And to her.
I dropped the bling off my balcony and deleted all her messages.
Maybe I am being foolish, but I think not. What about you? Would you put up with Miss Bling? I'd really like to know.
Aloha oe,

A.J.

The Book and the Rose

By A.J. Llewellyn

The Book and the Rose, my next release with Amber Allure, the GLBT imprint of Amber Quill Press comes out on April 25, exactly a month from now. I am already jumping up and down with excitement.
I love the cover (I think Trace Edward Zaber is not only an awesome publisher but an incredible artist who puts his heart into our covers) but I am ecstatic because I asked especially for this release date - and I got it!
The Book and the Rose comes out on a day that may not be especially significant in the US but in Europe is celebrated as St. George's Day.
In Barcelona (where the book is set), it is an especially significant day. It is Diada de la Sant Jordi - a festival dubbed the Book and the Rose.
Last Thanksgiving, I met and befriended a wonderful couple, Marisa and Jason. When they found out what I do, they told me how they met in Barcelona 54 years ago.
I was agog when they told me about the wonderful tradition of the Book and the Rose. It is a bigger holiday in Spain than Valentine's Day and culturally, it is wonderful.
All the book stores open for a week, non-stop. It is tradition for women all over Barcelona to shop aggressively for the most wonderful, perfect book to give their men. The men meanwhile, shop equally aggressively for the perfect rose to give their women.
In a society where we are actively closing down our beloved brick and mortar bookstores, I am over the moon about anything that celebrates books.
Created over a hundred years ago by an innovative bookseller, this festival draws thousands of tourists to Barcelona every year.
I love that romance, the spirit of St. George, slayer of dragons and that books, beautiful books are celebrated. I also love that it is not commercialized, like Valentine's Day.
I learned so much from Marisa and Jason who encouraged me to 'borrow' their love story. Since mine involves too hot guys, a whole different world emerges.
Stay tuned next month for an excerpt of The Book and the Rose, but in the meantime, I will say this.
The Book and the Rose is about Evans McCoy, a Hollywood TV producer who meets a mysterious, hot Barcelona businessman, Mio Alejo-Cortez. Invited to spend Diada de la Sant Jordi with Mio, Evans soon learns that Mio isn't your garden-variety successful businessman. He's a recently retired gay porn star working has a high-priced rent boy.
Can their love survive The Book and the Rose?

Aloha oe,

A.J.

Making Yourself Hot

By A.J. Llewellyn

So I was at an Oscar party like almost everybody else in L.A. on Sunday and one of the people present asked me about writing sex scenes for my books.
"Do you ever turn yourself on with your scenes?" he asked.
Hell yeah! I mean, if I didn't...if my scenes don't get me at least er...happy, how can I expect my readers to get worked up over them?
I think long and hard about each sex scene I write. Sometimes they're brief and hot, sometimes they're long and romantic. I am mindful of the fact that I have two groups of readers. Those who read and re-read every sex scene and remember every detail - and those who skip over them for the story. I guess it's a good sign that there's something for them to read when they're skipping over the sex, right?
But I digress.
Anyway, sometimes these scenes come naturally. They're no effort at all. I had a whole sex scene from page one in Diura that I swear just came into my mind like a movie. Sometimes I have to work on it...especially when it's part of a series and I think - hey, have I written one like this before? But after 60 books published, you do run out of original ideas considering each one has several sex scenes.
I look to a variety of sources for inspiration when I am feeling stumped.Beyond gay porn which is a sparkling novelty always guaranteed to ignite some creativity, I like to read. Right now, Nick Capra's blogs are providing a lot of grist for the mill.
He's not only one of the hottest porn stars out there but frankly the best of the porn star bloggers.I love his Confessions of a Recovering Hooker posts. I think he needs to write books and I've been encouraging him to do so.
He is a tremendous, important new voice in the world of gay erotic writing.
Porn star Erik Rhodes blog once inspired a scene for my Waikiki Vampire book Ma Ma Loa. The way Erik feels about his porn star career seemed perfect for my fictional gay vampire, Tem.
Steve Cruz's tales of traveling with a portable douche bag seemed perfect for my male escort Mio in the upcoming The Book and the Rose.
I recently renewed my Men at Play subscription and I've been enjoying those hot little trysts.Of course with two more books pending for me with gay porn director John Bruno, my thoughts are straying toward creating, not being inspired by such scenes since what I'll be writing in the Massive Studio series will be filmed.
I think the thing about writing love scenes and sex scenes is to make them as imaginative as possible while keeping them plausible. I have been accused of having an aversion to beds since most of my characters use them as little as possible, but hey, ya gotta keep it interesting. On the page and off.
What about other authors and readers?
How do you feel about this subject?

Aloha oe,

A.J.